Category Archives: happiness

Staying positive in a negative world

I believe myself to be a very positive person. I try not to let people or things bring me down. Of course, there are some days that this is not possible, but for the most part, I tend to stay pretty positive things.

That’s not to say that I don’t have bad days. I’ve had a few of those lately, but when I’m feeling down, I look at the 10 habits of positive people, and re-set my mind.

1. Positive people expect their plans to work out

Sometimes our plans don’t work out like we want them to, but I try to make sure mine do. I usually have a Plan B ready just in case Plan A doesn’t work out, and that’s okay too. Having a back up is never a bad thing!

2. Positive people don’t dwell on failure

I used to dwell on my failures a lot – my parenting skills, my financial situation – but I have learned through reading and counselling that it’s not healthy to dwell on it. Learn from the mistakes and don’t make them again!

3. They are always busy doing something useful

Okay so maybe I don’t do this all the time. Surfing the internet doesn’t seem overly useful but then, it is my way of relaxing so perhaps it’s not that bad after all.

4. They don’t wait for change, they create it

Absolutely this is me! I have never been afraid of change, and actually thrive on it. When creating my changes, it makes me happy and even more positive.

5. Positive people learn to let go

This is the hardest one for me. I have learned to let a lot go, but there are still twangs of guilt that come up every now and then that bring me down, sometimes for days. But eventually I do let it go and I realize that other people’s opinions are just that – their opinions. It should not reflect on me. I am still learning this one.

6. They don’t wait for happiness, they create it

This is the same as change – you just need to do what makes you happy. Happiness won’t come to you, you need to make your happiness.

7. Positive people live in the present moment

Definitely do this all the time!! No sense living in the past, it’s done and can’t be fixed. The future is not here yet. Today is. Live for today.

8. They search for solutions

Again, I try to do this as much as I can. As long as I am trying to find that solution, I will be positive because I’m working on it. I am not sitting back and saying oh well it is what it is.

9. Positive people never consider themselves as victims of circumstances

I used to consider myself a victim. Sometimes the best thing to do is talk to someone – a friend, a therapist – it’s not a bad thing to do. And it will make things clearer for you. Taking charge of your life is the best way to become more positive.

10. Positive people take responsibility for their actions and for their life

Don’t play the blame game. It is your life. Take responsibility. Own it. Make it your life. Not someone else’s. Don’t imitate others, thinking that oh well they are happy so I should do that too. If it’s not something YOU really want, then it won’t ever make you happy.

So these are the things that I do, sometimes not every day. I have had a few days lately that I have not been my positive self, but I woke up this morning and thought – what is wrong with me? NOTHING! Nothing is wrong with me. I am allowed to have a bad day every now and then. It’s part of life. Nothing is perfect, but that doesn’t mean I stop being the positive person I am.

I wish you all a very happy and POSITIVE day!

Adventures and long drives!

Today was a good day that started with breakfast with a good friend, and some shopping with her.  It was a lovely way to start the day.

I arrived home to have my parents ask me if I wanted to go to Fort Erie this afternoon for some more shopping and an early dinner. They suggested one of my favourite restaurants to go to, so I said SURE! 

As is usual these days, I got behind the wheel.  My parents got themselves situated and off we went. As we were driving, some regular chatter went on about what we were driving by, I had some back seat driving directed at me (which I politely ignored), and overall a nice drive to the stores we were heading to. 

My mum and I went into the store while my dad stayed in the car.  We went to a few stores, purchased some things (clothing and baking stuff were on my agenda today), and came back to the car.  We got in, headed to the restaurant and enjoyed a lovely dinner of fish and chips.  So far so good!  As I was getting my dad’s walker in the car, I had an inspiration to take them for a drive by the old campground that we camped at for many years.  After a quick discussion, it was decided that yes we would do that.

After about 20 minutes, we came to the road where the campground was. I was immediately asked where I was going. I replied, again politely, that this was the road we camped on.  We drove past it, to see that it was not the same as when we camped.  In fact, it does not resemble the campground at all. Rather disappointing but we had many fond memories there and we regaled them.

I decided I would continue on with the drive – I love driving so any excuse to drive is a good one for me!  We drove along the lake, they told me stories of different places we were passing, and as the time was passing, I realized I had travelled much further than I had planned, and in an area I really wasn’t familiar with.  So my thought was to start heading back towards our town, without really saying anything about not knowing where I was.  But – a ha!! – my father caught on and asked me if I knew where I was.  Good heartedly, I laughed and said of course!

He did not fall for it, and I could see him looking out the window being a bit confused.  He commented that he had no idea where we were and if I knew where I was going. My mother caught my look, and started laughing – with me? At me?  I like to think she was laughing with me – again good heartedly I said sure I do. I am not driving into the lake so I know I’m going in the right direction!   Laughter filled the car.

I got a bit concerned as I continued on, as I honestly had no idea where I was. Not a clue.  There was a sign at one corner and I didn’t recognize the name at all. Except that I had managed to drive into another county – which was not close to home.  So, in my mind, I told myself  – self, turn right at the next big road and hope for the best. So I did.  Another comment was made, asking me what the name of the road was that we were on, I waited for a highway sign, and said the highway number.  Well, Dad wanted to know more about the road, and I said I don’t know but I am pretty sure I’m going in the right direction. My mum looked over and smirked – I swear she was laughing with me but I was beginning to think she was laughing at me.  Ah well, it was okay. I continued driving for what seemed a longer time than it took to get to where we we had been – and then I saw it. A corner I recognized!  I triumphantly said see I knew where I was going all the time!  But they were on to my game – and both laughed.  And I knew then that they were both laughing at me. 

Sometimes you just need to take a guess, pick a road and GO!  You never know where it will take you. Sometimes it will take you exactly where you want to be!

What can you see?

Shadows, clouds in the sky, so many things that are every day events can make our imaginations play tricks on our minds. So – what can you see?

A shadow of me …. but what else can you see?

Remember when you were a child, and you’d lay on your back and look at the clouds? You’d see a dinosaur, or maybe a rabbit. Your imagination would be at play while looking at the clouds float by in the sky.

Wispy, wavy clouds

I think adults need to do this more. I was out walking today, a few times, and enjoying the gorgeous day that we had here, and I looked up at the blue skies and watched the clouds float by. They looked like waves to me today. Wispy type waves.

Reflections… and a lonely stick

I love taking pictures. I try to get a good angle when I take them to make them more interesting, at least to me! I look back at the pictures and try to see things I may have missed when taking the picture. And, maybe not surprising to some, all my pictures are taken with my phone. I love my Samsung!

Beautiful trees… that make me sneeze!

Maybe tomorrow, if the skies are blue and clouds float by, we should all take a moment and look up, stop and see what we can see.

Empowerment and self image

Do you have a positive image of yourself?  Are you happy with your body?  Are there things you want to change about your physical image to make you feel happy? 

Many questions – but they are ones I have been thinking about a lot in the past few months.  So much so that I have decided to join Weight Watchers (or WW as they are now called!), and I also am now going to the Y on a regular basis (just about every day).  Yet, I continue to self-sabotage by eating whatever I want at night – regardless of the amount of sugar is involved. 

Do I have a positive image of myself?  Yes.  I am a strong, independent woman who may be overweight but still confident about how I look.

Am I happy with my body?  Not really but that’s why I joined WW and the Y.  I am trying very hard to get my body into shape once again and feel healthy.  I have an insatiable sweet tooth and it drives me crazy but I really don’t know how to solve that (drinking water when I am hungry does NOT help, and neither do carrots!).  So, I self-sabotage with cookies (at least they are sugar free but they are still cookies!).  One day I hope to develop the self control I really want.  For now I will continue to eat, exercise and count those points with WW!

Are there things I want to change about my physical image to make me feel happy?  Yes.  I want to get back to a size 12, where I felt the best.  I want to be able to buy clothes in the departments that are not “plus size”.  I want to be able to wear a cute summer dress without worrying about my flabby arms and tummy showing. 

Self-image is such an important part of our lives, especially from the early teens.  I always considered myself as the heavy one among my friends in high school.  They could all wear cute clothes, and jeans that fit nicely.  I was always the heavy one (at least that’s how I perceived myself).  And this was in the early 80’s – long before social media and the constant stream of these images the young girls have to look at now.

I feel bad for the young girls (and boys) coming into high school, and having to deal with bullying because of an image they portray, which definitely is more prominent in this day and age.  I would love to be able to go to my old high school, and sit down with a group of young ladies in Grade 9 and explain to them that they ARE beautiful just the way they are.  Being a woman is a beautiful thing, and we all struggled in our teens with some demon in our mind telling us we weren’t good enough in some way.  I want young girls to know that this does NOT have to affect them as they grow older.  That they can take control of their lives and learn to ignore the bullying and negativity, and feel beautiful just the way they are.  No matter their size or whatever else it is that brings their self-image down. 

Empowering young women is something that I strive to do!  I want to let young women know all over the world that every single one of them is beautiful in their own way, and that they are all strong and can do whatever it is they strive to do, no matter what anyone tells them.

So yes – we may all have our doubts about ourselves now and then.  That is a normal thing!  It’s not anything unusual and we can overcome these feelings.  Just remember – we are all beautiful!

As the rain falls…

April showers bring May flowers.  Most of us have heard this all our lives.  The flowers are starting to arrive, and the colours are becoming brighter.  No longer are we seeing the dullness that is early spring.  Bright colours are abounding!

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Beautiful spring colours!

 

However, for some of us, rain brings pain.  Arthritic pain, depression (which IS a pain!), and cabin fever.  We want to be outside at this time of year but when the rain falls, it’s difficult to get out and do the things we enjoy.  I know that I want to get outside walking more, and get that bike that I bought last year out and ride it before the humidity strikes and makes me want to stay inside!

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I sometimes feel like this crab when it rains!!

 

As I look out my window this evening, as the day begins to end, the grayness of the sky makes it look quite bleak.  But I know, when the sky becomes bright in the morning, a new day has started and, with that, a new mood for the new day begins!  Why don’t we all start our days with a smile and a promise to ourselves to be positive no matter the weather!

 

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A new day is just on the horizon!!

 

 

 

I “have to” or I “get to”…

I read something very interesting today – it was a remark from someone on Facebook about how they changed their perspective simply by changing one word — “have” to “get”.  It seems so simple – but is it really?

Let’s consider this – I have to go to work today – sounds like something you would probably avoid if you had the chance.  Something daunting.  Unpleasant.

So let’s change the words.  I get to go to work today.  It sounds like it’s a great thing right?  It sounds like you are excited about doing it.  It’s something you are looking forward to doing.

And it was such a simple change — from a 4 letter word to a 3 letter word.  Have to Get.

I could think of my life in a negative way – I have to get up and run errands for my parents.  Sounds negative.  BUT if I change it to – I get to get up and run errands for my parents!  At least to me, it sounds like a pleasant thing to do.

Let’s take it a bit further — I have to blog tonight because it’s been so long since I have. (and yes I did actually think that this morning).  I changed it later today to – I get to blog tonight because I have a night off and can really think about it!  I got excited by simply saying it that way.

It’s amazing that by changing that one word, how much better my day turned out.  I changed the word with many things today (not just about blogging!) and it definitely turned my attitude around.

Try it – you may be surprised at how easy it is!

Waterways of Welland

Today was a beautiful day here in Southern Ontario – and I was lucky enough to have the day off of work to get out and enjoy the weather for a few hours.  I have a desire to be near water and Welland offers some beautiful waterways.   I spent my afternoon sitting by the canal, writing and relaxing.  It was the perfect afternoon.

 

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