I feel 40. How about you?
In just over a month, I will be turning 52. I cannot believe I am this age. On most days, I feel like I am somewhere between 30 and 40. Of course, there are days I wake up and as I climb out of bed, my body reminds me of my age!!
Being in my 50s is amazing but of course there are fears I have had to overcome, and am still working on.
Being alone as we age. I like being single, I like having my own space, eating what I want, going where I want. But there is this voice in the back of my head that comes out to rear its ugly head every now and then and yell at me that I should find someone to grow old with. At times I think it would be nice to have that, but I am so independent I don’t think there’s any man who would tolerate me. Perhaps one day …
Being a solo traveler. This was a huge fear when I first moved to Prague ~ that overwhelming feeling that came over me as I boarded that plane ~ what the hell was I doing? I was scared. I didn’t know if I would be safe. Would I go screaming back to the airport and back to Canada because of the fear that was racing through my body? Of course not. But I learned to be very aware of my surroundings and to always have a charged cell phone with me. It is all a matter of being sensible, looking confident and making yourself NOT look like a tourist. (Put the guidebooks away!)
Changing your career. This is something I think our families are more afraid of for us. I have changed my job every few years anyway so while it is challenging at this age to change a career, it is not impossible. Change is scary at any age ~ you just have to take that leap of faith and believe in yourself. I did and look at me now! It is still a bit scary but fear motivates me.
While I was in Shenyang this week, I befriended a lovely young lady and we spent the day together doing tourist things together (Chinese people are so friendly!). She asked me how old I was, and I told her. She first was shocked and then replied with “I never would have thought you were in your 50’s ~ you are the coolest person !” It made my day that she thought I was cool and that she dismissed my age so quickly. It didn’t matter to her how old I was ~ she just wanted to hang out.
Age is just a number. You really are as old as you feel. So while my 52nd birthday approaches, I will continue to act however I want and will face my fears straight on. And when those voices start telling me things like I shouldn’t do this or that, I will just push those away and continue on with my awesome and “cool” life.