I am sitting on my couch, listening to my washer, I’ve turned off the TV and did some deep breathing before I turned on my computer for a bit.
My daughter has some friends visiting for the next week and she is off to spend the night with them, enjoying some company from back home and she’s getting some quiet time away from the baby. I had an amusing afternoon and evening with my very rambunctious one year old grandson – who decided that tonight was the night that he was going to feed himself. That took him about an hour but he managed to eat all his dinner plus more than I expected him to! So that’s a win for grandma AND grandson!
He was a bit of a pain to get to bed tonight – it was a busy day yesterday and then today was a bit stressful because of mom going out and staying out for the night. I didn’t really think he’d get that but he was definitely missing his mom tonight. I did manage to get him settled down though, and now I’m enjoying MY me time.
For someone like me who relishes her alone time, I don’t get much of that anymore. This is the first time in a while living with someone – I miss living on my own. But I know this is not a forever situation and that I will be on my own again. For now I am enjoying my grandson time.
But tonight – tonight is my quiet time. My time to sit back and have a cup of tea and get out a magazine to read it cover to cover. Meditate a bit. Do some more deep breathing exercises. And then go to bed early. Early for me is 11.00 or 11.30 – but I plan on going to bed before that tonight. He is an early riser and I need to be ready for that.
Stress does weird things to our bodies and minds. This morning, I woke up – twice. Sounds weird? No – it’s something called “false awakenings”. I was having a dream within a dream. I’ve had them before, always during stressful times in my life.
Yes I am under stress and suffering a bit from insomnia, but I really didn’t think I was as stressed as I apparently am. Once I finally woke up, I went inside my head and told myself that everything will be okay. Did some deep breathing. And meditated for a few minutes. I am now up and feeling a lot better!
What was in both dreams really doesn’t matter – because they made no sense at all!
I just want to remind everyone to take one day at a time, that if you think positive thoughts, positive outcomes will happen. So brush aside any self doubts, take some deep breaths, and carry on.
I was not always a positive person – I was depressed, full of worry over money, my kids and just life in general. I hated feeling that way, and was at a loss of what to do. My kids fed off of my attitude and became the same way. It took me moving away from Ontario to become the positive person I am now. Between moving to Calgary and then moving to Prague, I realized that the environment I exposed myself to back then definitely affected my attitude.
Now that I have returned to live in Ontario after being away since 2011, I have become very aware of the negativity in my life. I remain a positive person, but the people I am exposed to are incredibly negative people.
There comes a time in every woman’s life that the change happens – yes menopause. I am going through it right now and hot flashes are NOT fun. I don’t seem to be experiencing mood swings but there are people at work going through this right now. In particular, one woman. She is the most negative, miserable person I have ever met in my life who has the biggest mood swings I have ever seen. And her mood has almost made me succumb back to my negative thinking. One day last week, she had me in such a state, I was glad to have my break. During my break, I sat down, closed my eyes and meditated. I realized that it was not me in particular that she is angry at (well maybe it’s me a bit but I don’t know why and that’s not my problem). After deep breathing and then listening to some music, I came back, put a smile on my face and have not let her bother me since.
I refuse to let anyone ever again affect me and my positive attitude. The customers enjoy talking to me, my other fellow employees and I have a lot of fun working together and I love this job. It is not teaching – one day it will be my career again but right now is not that time.
I know I do not need to move away to find peace in my mind and enjoy my time back in my hometown. As I have discovered, there is so much to do in life and so much to see and enjoy, and I won’t let little things bring me down like I did years ago.